So This Is Love! - Part 2 The Perfect vs The Real

Ok, so where were we. Oh, yes the perfect man. For those of you that just tuned in, yesterday I was talking about a movie that I just watched called The Perfect Man. It stars Hilary Duff, Heather Locklear, and Chris Noth. The story is a heartwarming comedy. It is the story about mothers, daughters and the lengths people will go sometimes for love. So if you missed reading yesterday’s post you may want to go back and read it first.

Today I’m on my second thought about the movie. It came because of the title of the movie “The Perfect Man”. What is the perfect man or for that fact the perfect woman? Well if all I have to do is answer this simple question my post today will be very short. The answer is there is no such thing as a perfect woman and the only perfect man was Jesus Christ. OK I’m all done. Well not really.

If we are Christians and we are looking for the perfect man, what we are really looking for is a “Real Man”. By that term what I mean is a "Real Man" of faith. Let me put it this way. What is the difference between a real twenty dollar bill and a counterfeit twenty dollar bill? They may look the same, but one has value and the other does not. What you are looking for is the real thing. There are those that say they are saved and believe in Jesus Christ as their savior, but the way they live shows that their words have no value. A “Real Man” (and “Real Woman” too) live their faith every day. You have no doubt about their faith and their beliefs, because they live to follow God’s will for their lives, glorifying Him, and honoring Him each and every day.

So where can we find some guidelines to help us judge if a man is a “Real Man” or if a woman is a “Real woman” of faith. The Bible is always the best place for that.

Colossians 3:1-4 says, “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.” “Real Men” and “Real Women” put their faith first in their lives.

Colossians 3:5-11 says, “Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.” These are things that you should keep an eye out for. “Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.” Before you were saved you might have had no problems with these things, but now that you are saved if you are a “Real Man” or a “Real Woman” of faith, you should see these things as unacceptable. Before you were saved cussing and swearing, using bad language might have been a habit of yours, but now that you are saved this is something you should not do and you should not accept as OK either. Understand that the excuse, “Well other people do it.” doesn’t cut it with God. You are sinning and not honoring Him if you are doing these things. ”Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.” Oh, does this hit home when you see so many relationships going down the tubes because one or both people are not being honest with each other or God. Ladies and gentlemen you can’t be a player and be a Christian too! “Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all.” It’s all or nothing with God. You have walk the walk, as well as talk the talk.

Colossians 3:12-14 says, “Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” Now there are five character traits you should be looking for in a “Real Man” or “Real Woman”. “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” A “Real Man” and “Real Woman” make every effort to work things out. They don’t carry grudges and they don’t keep reminding you of your errors once they are suppose to be forgiven. We may have disagreements and argue with others. Remember, none of us are perfect. But we make peace, forgive, and move on in a way that honors God. “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” Above all we love each other the way God tells us to.

Colossians 3:15-17 says, “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.” You can see the peace and joy when it lives in someone’s heart. “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” This is just telling you again that a “Real Man” and a “Real Woman” live their faith.

There is another place in the Bible that you can look too. Ephesians 5:1-2 says, “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” We should us Christ as a model for our lives.
Ephesians 5:3-7 says, “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.” You can’t be a “Real Man” or “Real Woman” if you have these impure things in your life. “For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a man is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.” Clearer words were never said. “Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God's wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them.” This is specifically talking to those that live their lives as counterfeit Christians.

Ephesians 5:8-14 says, “For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord.” Children of the light are the “Real Men” and “Real Women” of faith. “Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.” It not only tells you have nothing to do with counterfeit Christians, it tells you to call them out for who they really are. “For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is light that makes everything visible.” When you take a close look at people using these Bible guidelines, it becomes very clear how “Real Men” and “Real Women” of faith should be living their lives. “’This is why it is said: "Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.’"

Ephesians 5:15-21 says, “Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is." If you know the scripture and you know the Lord’s will for your life you can’t be fooled or sucked in by the worldly evil that is around us. “Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.” You don’t need to look for escapes or things to make you artificially happy if you are filled with the Spirit. An artificial “high” always come with a price too. “Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Again this is just telling you if you say you believe it you live it.

Now back to the “Real Man”. Proverbs 18:22 tells us, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.” Funny, it does not say that the other way around. A woman is God’s special gift to a man and should be treated as such. I personally think it is the man's responsibility to make sure he is prepared faithfully to recognize the value of the gift God is prepared to give him. He must be ready to take care of it. He must be prepared to recognize the value of it, respect it, cherish it, and be faithful to it alone at all times. It should be cherished above all else except God. He should be ready to step up to the plate and be the Godly head of His faithful marriage. This does not mean being a dictator or a bully. It means that he is a partner to his wife that leads by modeling and by setting the example in their marriage. No faithful woman would have any trouble with a man being in charge of the household if the man truly loved and cherished his wife as the Bible tells him to. It says that a man should love his wife as Jesus loves the church. Men are you prepared faithfully to give a woman that much real love? Men are you "Real Men" of faith?

Ephesians 5:25-33 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body." As you can see God has a plan for us. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." "This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

Ok women see that last line you aren’t off the hook. I personally think it is the woman's responsibility to make sure she is prepared faithfully to be a gift that has true faithful value to a man. A woman that lives her life in faith putting God first is something that is priceless above all other worldly treasures. She should be ready to submit herself to him. No that does not mean she is just his maid or slave. It means she is ready to be his partner by faith fully. To commit herself only unto him, putting him first above all else except God. To love him and give to him freely and unselfishly. No faithful man would have any trouble giving freely to his wife and unselfishly cherishing a woman that truly loved, respected, and honored her husband as the Bible tells her to. It is how we prepare ourselves faithfully that will show others if we are a priceless gem, a fake imitation, or a gag gift. Women are you prepared faithfully to give a man this much real love? Women are you "Real Women" of faith?

Ephesians 5:22-24 says, “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.”

With first marriage success at only about 50% these days and remarriage success rates even lower it is telling us that we have not prepared ourselves to be "Real Men" and "Real Women" first. We must build our relationship with God first before we can look at building a relationship with anyone else.

Have you ever been asked what are you looking for in a wife or husband? We looked at this subject once in a Bible study class I was in. I wrote two poems to my future husband.

Eyes of Love

Eyes are the window to the soul
Showing emotions that we feel
I’m looking for the eyes of love
Telling me now that this is real

More precious than any diamond
They will sparkle with honesty
Twinkling like the stars above
Showing true love for only me

I’m looking for the eyes of love
Sparking with heat from passion’s fire
Mesmerizing me with their glow
Until I tremble with desire

I’m looking for the eyes of love
Eyes with tears to share our sorrows
Eyes that smile as they look ahead
To the joy of our tomorrows

I’m looking for the eyes of love
Respect that mirrors compassion’s care
That looks for strength from God above
Closing each day in humble prayer

I’ve not yet found the eyes of love
That by faith will always be true
Still I’m hoping that my searching
May now finally end with you

FaithfulToOne© 1998

Matthew 6:22-23
22 The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. 23 But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!


Seeds

Have patience my love we’ve planted our seeds
Faith’s fruitful harvest someday we’ll both see
Our devoted hearts He has heard in prayer
The course He now steers is to our destiny

Challenges and trials that keep us apart
Still like a locked door we just can’t get through
But its God’s will in the seeds we’ve planted
So it’s by His time I must wait for you

O precious Lord Jesus Christ our Savior
We seek your blessings and pray for new life
That faithfully we walk God’s lighted path
Someday soon as faithful husband and wife

Be vigilant my love with humble prayer
Joyful in hope may God’s words be your guide
Take comfort in prayer I am with you now
Pray someday soon I can stand by your side

FaithfulToOne © 2006

Romans 12:12
12Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

The Bible As A Soap Opera On Day Time TV?

Back when I was in college, I can remember walking through the Commons (A central campus building for students to come and hang out) on my way to classes every afternoon. I started to notice the same people there every day glued to the television sets. What were they watching? Soap Operas! You know- All My Children, General Hospital, etc. Now, I had never watched soap operas and never had any interest in them to start with, so I had no idea what the obsession was all about. Oh and yes for some it was a real obsession.

Not to long ago when my daughter moved back home to live with me for a while she started watching the soap opera Passions. She would tape it every day to make sure she would not miss it. A couple of times she was watching it when I was home and I sat down to see what the big deal was. This person was cheating on that person, then this person was plotting to kill that person, then this person was caught in a love triangle with that person, then this person was not really the father of the baby that belonged to that person, then this person was blackmailing that person for the indiscretions they committed and did not want anyone to know about, etc.

Oh my gosh, the drama of it all! I could always guess pretty well where the story lines were going, but it took forever for them to get there. They would drag what would normally be one episode on a night time drama, and then drag it out for weeks. Still, I could feel the way people get pulled into these soap operas and I stopped to think why?

Why are we so easily pulled into other people’s tragedies? Are there really so many drama voyeurs out there addicted to other people’s drama, sins, and miseries? Well, sadly the answer is yes. It is a whole lot easier to escape into someone else’s drama than to stop and face your own. I hate to tell you this but sin is in thought, word, and deed. Where is your mind going while you are watching all of this? Is it glorifying Him?

Then I got a great idea! Who knows maybe some big Hollywood screen writer will read this blog and I can say it was my idea first. Ok, I’ll stop the dreaming LOL. Well, my idea is why don’t they take all the dramatic stories in the Bible, put them in a today soap opera format, and spread God’s word that way. Hey, it could work.

My vote for part of the pilot show is The Book of Job. Wow, now if you want to read some drama at its best, read The Book of Job. (This is a very loose translation) So, here you have a man that is tested to his limits with one tragedy after another. Oh, the things that this man has to go through and endure are phenomenal. No, I am not going to tell you the whole story that would wreck it for you. I will tell you that the story has some powerful characters in it like Satan, God, and several more. If they put this in a soap opera format they would have people biting their nails waiting for the next day’s episode. OK, I am a sucker for happy endings, so I will tell you it has a very blessed and happy ending. You say that you have already read Job before? Well then I challenge you to go back and read it again with the soap opera format in mind. It sure made me look at it differently.

Have you ever been like Job? Has there ever been a time that you feel you just can’t take it anymore? You pray and nothing happens? Have you ever lashed out at God in anger? Have others ever been harsh with you when you are ready falling apart? Has God ever had to set the record right with you on an issue? Read Job and there you will find REAL DRAMA!

So often we are so caught up in learning the scripture, decoding the messages given to us in God’s word, listening to sermons about God’s word, and always seeing it in such a sterile setting that we miss what awesome characters and stories there are in the Bible. The Bible has it all people: Murder, mystery, adultery, betrayal, lust, friendship, love, sacrifice, etc. Forget the new television show Heroes, we have the best super hero character there is. The point that is even more totally awesome is that God, Jesus, and The Holy Spirit are all real and not just a bunch of fiction.

I’m reminded of a quote my mother had with a picture of a candle hanging on my younger brother’s wall when we were younger. My younger brother could show out with a very bad temper when he was younger. So, to remind him to think first she had this picture hanging up in his bedroom. It said, “Anger is the wind that blows out the light of reason!” This quote has a much deeper meaning to me now that I am an adult.

Oh, I almost forgot a couple of things since I was so excited about Job. First, if you want a bit of entertainment listen to Carman’s song, Soap Song. He incorporates the names of many of the soap operas into his song. It is a great entertaining and inspirational song. I have posted the lyrics to the song below with a link to his website. His music and messages are reaching so many people. Second, I have posted 2 poems from when I was going through so tough trials. It is so wonderful to know that if we have faith, trust, and patience in God when a window closes He will open a new door to a place that was even better than before. I look back on these poems now and can’t believe I was ever that low. I am so thankful for God’s love and His many blessings He has given me. Take care and God Bless.

Heavenly Father, I pray today for your continued wisdom and guidance in my life. Keep me from jumping to conclusions when I don’t understand or can’t see things clearly. I want my light to shine for you. Keep my light of reason burning bright so that I may not fall in Satan’s traps showing anger or doubting you. Keep my eyes and life always focused on you, so that my life may always honor you. Father, I praise you for the many doors you have opened in my life already and I look forward to tomorrow committed to my walk with you. I pray all this in Jesus name, Amen.



Soap Song

By Carman

Gone are the days of Leave it to Beaver,
Matt Dillon and his sidekick Festus.
Now we survive on the immoral lives
Of those of the Young and the Restless!!

It's not that they're young,
They're just uh, restless!
Not doing at all like they should!
So they go to the General Hospital,
And The Doctors can't do 'em no good.

So they keep on with their Search for Tomorrow
Not doing one thing that's right!
And they all end up in Another World,
About to fall off The Edge of Night!

But that shouldn't matter,
Cuz after all, As the World Turns
You only have but One Life to Live!

There remains a blessed hope for you
And All your Children,
More Hope than Ryan could ever give!

If we want true contentment, peace in our homes
With an end to marital strife
We must live for Jesus Christ
The Only Guiding Light
Not one, but All The Days of our Lives!

For more information about Carman's music and mission click here-
http://www.carman.org/index.shtml

If you have just made a decision to follow Jesus or if you want to put a prayer concern on a global prayer chain click here- http://www.carman.org/faith/



In Darkest Hours


I stared lost tonight gazing up at the ebony sky
Wondering why time seemed to keep passing us by
Hopes and dreams like stars once sparkled so bright
Clouds of doubt overcast the damp cold darkened night

There was neither the welcomed heat nor fiery glow
From the reassuring gentle touches felt long ago
And like the blazing sun and summer’s cheerful days
Those precious warm feelings seemed so very far away

The dark lonely winter that now brings a brisk shiver
Satan’s constant jabs causing scarred skin to quiver
His chilling cold touch penetrating deep to the bone
Stirring faithless doubts into the lingering unknown

Still pondering hard on the many thoughts you wrote,
Piercing cold rushes quickly now through my thin coat,
As evil’s grip tightens at my heart urging fright and flight,
With tears falling on my cheek like the rain into the night.

Has God’s gift to us so quickly become last years present,
A lack of faith jeopardizing precious love and commitment,
Have feet strayed from the path stronger legs once traveled,
Faltering and weak seeing hopes and dreams soon unraveled.

Sweet man let us not lose focus on His bright glorious light,
Like the stars His love can pierce through the cold dark night,
I need my “Real Man” his head bowed now with mine in prayer,
Strengthening our faith through the trials we united must share.

Together let us renew our faithful commitment to our loving Lord,
His strength can then be our battle’s shield and unyielding sword,
With prayers and praises Satan’s grip will relinquish to His powers,
We can walk safely comforted through these long stressful hours.

God forgive me for the faithless worries making me falter and weak,
Your heavenly leadership is what I still need and lovingly seek,
I pray humbled for God’s wisdom to still be my blessing and guide,
I pray that His will for you is standing strong in faith by my side.

FaithfulToOne © 2006



I Now Know A Different Path


Lost now forever in the far away distance
Where even straining I can no longer see
Connections your heart once lovingly made
Tenderly in faith reaching out to me

There I stood in faith on our path
Once feeling so lost and alone
Left to wonder why it’s your heart
That felt such a need still to roam

This ring a symbol of undying love
You proposed and asked me to wear
It came with promise and commitment
The same ones you asked me to share

Then came trials of patience and that of time
Commitment must always face the true test
Your faith failed to place love on the altar
Valued and cherished above all the rest

Then to discover your heart so unsettled
It was clear you felt a need still to roam
Your choice sacrificed our hopes and dreams
With it our future, our family, and our home

The time came and our paths were parted
Still I offered this forgiveness and I pray
That in your search someday you’re given
What you chose so freely to take away

May God now bless you and keep you
To guide you in faith each day from above
Seek Him in prayer to lead your search
For the one in faith you really should love

It is Almighty God that now directs me
And fills me full with so much love
His words healed me and now protects me
As I honor his will and direction from above

Oh it’s what He’s really given me now
And not what you chose to take away
With His love in patience I wait on Him
Because I know His love’s here to stay

I have neither worries nor a shed of doubt
My heart feels the anguishing pain no more
Because I see now when He closed a window
He chose to bless me with a new open door

FaithfulToOne © 2006


Job 1:20-22
20 At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship 21 and said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised." 22 In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.

My Footsteps In The Valley

I would never have believed that I would be at this point in my life. Yes a bit bruised and tattered from trials I have been through, but a much stronger better person that has grown so much in faith. As I use this blog to share some of my footsteps in the valley with you I am preparing for my next climb in faith. If you are walking in a valley right now know that there is hope and that you are never alone. With faith you can rise above the trials that are pulling you down.


I Will Rise

Satan so many you have blinded
Using our failures we become silent and meek
Selfish longing and our stubborn pride
Weapons you use to make us weak

Satan you’ve done your best to pull me down
With your subtle, bitter, twisted lies
Making mountains out of mole hills
But with faith in God I will rise

Does my close walk with God anger you
With clenched fists you plan my fall
Then God’s hand extends to rescue me
Saved from backsliding I hear His call

Temptation and fear are there to defeat me
Leaving me with only desperate cries
My Lord will never abandon me
With praise I sing God I will rise

Satan you fool people with your fantasies
Your false dreams are the noose’s rope
Your goal separates us from our Father
Yet in darkest valleys He gives us Hope

Long ago Jesus Christ was sacrificed
His life was given to pay the cost
Our salvation now there to defeat you
By faith in Christ no one must be lost

Proclaiming words my Lord once spoke
Satan with me you will have no ties
Our Lord told all with ears to hear
Have true faith and know I will rise

Each time you knock me down I get stronger
My God heals me and gives me peace
Through faith and prayer He always hears me
God’s love for me will never cease

Satan my inspired words I use in battle
To plant the seed of faith that never dies
My gift a witness for the lost to be saved
Each one shouting in praise I will rise.

FaithfulToOne © 2007